13 – The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring(2001)

Merry draws the short straw and gets the carrot in the arse.

Merry draws the short straw and gets the carrot in the arse.

Part one of the trilogy here,I’m just after looking up the list and i see the last part is a couple of films away.Shit,it would have been nice to watch them in order.Another 3 and a half hour epic here.I’d love to find out how many extras Jackson had for this one,or even for any of the films because there always seems to be a load of orc or urkhi knocking about.In this one Jackson introduces us to all the characters in a light and comedic way.But as the story progresses we get a lot of homoerotic looks between hobbits. It takes away form the film at times.Then there is Frodo who seems to blow his load every-time he either pops the ring on or gets stabbed.The film starts out in the Shire with Ian Holm playing a 111 year old Bilbo Baggins getting ready to retire and bugger off and die,he wills everything to Frodo including the ring.Gandalf finds out what the ring is and then the story is off.In the first hour i was questioning the whole idea that you can make a ring and it gives you power.Also when Sauran puts the ring on,over a big metal glove which has a bigger diameter than the ring,he gets super strong,yet when someone else puts it on they turn invisible. What good is it then?Okay so your invisible but what if i build a bomb and throw it in your general direction?I had a laugh out loud bit when Gimli the dwarf,who hates elves,asks for a hair of Cate Blanchetts head and then he says “she gave me three”.Retarded.Also in this he said “nobody tosses a dwarf” and in the third film Aragon tosses him off.Gross.Now for a few good/bad points-the underwater sequences that are obviously no shot under water=bad.That scene where Galadriel,the elf queen,turns into the dark queen is amazing=good.

IMDB RATING      –     8.8
MY RATING     –    8.3
SEEN BEFORE     –    YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     – SAME AS THE REST.VERY GOOD.FEW TEARY MOMENTS.LIKE GANDALF AND BOROMIR KICKING IT.

21 – The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

The Olympic Torch makes its way into isengard.

The Olympic Torch makes its way into isengard.

Lord of The Rings is about a wealthy English nobleman who has a penchant for collecting wedding rings.Not,everyone knows what LOTR is about.I was looking forward to this on the list but when the film starts it just jumps right in.The story begins right after the credits,no humming or ha-ing.It’s the second film so i guess there was reason to go back and retell or introduce anything.That’s why the first third of the film i wasn’t too bothered about the characters,then the second third i was just getting to know them again and there side stories and the last bit i was excited and now that it’s over i want to watch the next one.But i don’t think i’ll bother,i seen it some 10 years,yes it’s been 10 years,ago and it’s a long film too.I found a lot of the CGI didn’t hold the test of time.I guess when you’re making an epic film,or three,you have to skimp and cut corners somewhere and there was more scenes than i care to mention that the special effects just looked a bit on the shit side for me.Great story though and fair dues to Jackson for tackling and fighting to get the rights to make the film.Lets see,notable stuff:Aragon or the buck who plays him is a solid actor,merry and pippen come across as too camp in places,Sauromon must spend half his day combing his hair up in that castle like Rapunzele or something.Also the Orcs had a pretty good grasp of language,who taught them how to speak?I noticed 2 chatting to each other while guarding the black gate,what would they be talking about? “Going out for the weekend?” , “How’s the missus?”

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    7.8
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  EITHER WATCH THEM ALL TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL.