57 – Double Indemnity (1944)

Double indemnity? More like double line spacing.

Double indemnity? More like double line spacing.

Double Indemnity or as it’s called in Mexico ‘Perdicion’ is a 1940’s film noir movie about an insurance scam where a wife bumps off her husband.I messed up while downloading this film.I went to play it and it was over dubbed in Mexican with no subtitles.So i downloaded some subs and the third ones were in sync.For Double Indemnity the subs were really fast with there being often 3-5 lines of text.The main character is an insurance salesman who works for a big firm.One day while he’s calling to the house of a client to renew their car insurance he encounters his young wife who has ideas of killing the husband.He says take a run and jump,but a few hours later when she calls to his house and he gets the ride then he’s all in.Manipulated or what?They formulate a pretty good plan for killing him and have some solid alibis.The plan goes off without a hitch and it all looks good.But as usual that’s not for long.The film is told as a flashback that only catches up to present time in the last 5 minutes,which i wasn’t expecting. I’m not sure if it’s a good version because of the dubbed/subtitled thing i watched was too taxing on the brain.

IMDB RATING      –     8.4
MY RATING     –    6.7
SEEN BEFORE     –     NO
RECOMMEND?     –     NO
OVERALL     –  IT MIGHT BE GOOD IF YOU GET THE RIGHT VERSION OF IT.

60 – The Lives of Others (2006)

This guy is giving the dimensions of one of the smallest typewriters there is.it's 19 cm by 19 cm by 99cm.99 cm? What the fuck.It's three foot wide or tall?wtf.

This guy is giving the dimensions of one of the smallest typewriters there is.it’s 19 cm by 19 cm by 99cm.99 cm? What the fuck.It’s three foot wide or tall?wtf.

The so called socialist party with their hundreds of thousands of spies,and that’s no exaggeration,all spying on each other.Looking for the most minuscule detail to rat out their fellow country men for what?For a corrupt governing body to abuse its power for its own personnel gain.Well let me get into the plot for a bit.A professional interrogator,and spy who is now a lecture-er in an East Germany college teaching new recruits about the skills needed to spot someone in cahoots with the west,is pulled into  help out an old friend investigate on an artist.The artist is a writer and writes plays.But there’s an ulterior motive.The guy is of no interest to the Stazi,however his girlfriend is of interest to some fat fuck.So what does he do?Abuses his power and resources to try and catch out her boyfriend and get him banged up.Thus leaving her free for him.However the guy leading the operation and monitoring has some sort of change of heart.By living his life vicariously through the writer and his girlfriend he finds some sort of common ground or compassion and does his best to conceal their illegal activity.It’s all very out of character for him.When the wall comes down everything changes and the writer tracks down the man who was responsible for monitoring him with info he got via the freedom of information act.It’s a good film.I wasn’t sure what year it was set at during the beginning.I may have blinked and missed a title card.But the clothes and the sets gave nothing away.

IMDB RATING      –     8.4
MY RATING     –    7.3
SEEN BEFORE     –     NO
RECOMMEND?     –     NO
OVERALL     –  NOT BAD.JUST OKAY THOUGH.

P.S. on a re-read just now,the ,punctuation is pretty off.on this one.And,for that,i am.Sorry.

62 – Amélie (2001)

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You have to be quick if you’re going to get a screen grab of these tits.

I’m not quite sure what to call Amelie.It seems a bit art house but i think it’s pretty mainstream too.I’ve always regarded it the perfect chick flick,or one you’d watch if you were pitching woo at a girl.Well that’s the vibe i get off it anyway.Audrey Tautou looks not too bad in this.I think in nearly every shot she’s filmed from above as to exagerate her eyes and make her look more innocent or pure.The visual and special effects in this are perfect.I couldn’t find one i’d fault.I don’t have an internet connection right now but i’d love to know what the budget was for the SFX.I read online a few weeks ago that Audrey can’t actually skim stones and all the stone skimming sequences were done post prodution with after effects.I think it would have been easier,and cheaper,to teach her how to do it.There’s so many good features to the films;the fantasy sequences,good use of stock footage,original plot,musical score and the overall look of the film with the green filters and camera angles.A good indie film with,i guess,a cult following.

IMDB RATING      –     8.4
MY RATING     –    8.6
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  ORIGINAL FILM.VERY INDIE.TAUTOU IS EASY ON THE EYE TOO.

76 – Cinema Paradiso (1988)

This is how i feel when i watch most Guy Richie films.Like someone just threw shit into my eyes.

This is how i feel when i watch most Guy Richie films.Like someone just threw shit into my eyes.

Cinema Paradiso is an Italian film about a boy and his obsession and love for cinema and film.Most of the film is show as  a flashback with the final 45 minutes or so set in the present.The story is split into three time lines.Salvatore De Vita,or Toto, as a young boy,then as an adolescent and finally as a fifty something year old.In the first segment we meet Toto a small kid who visits the cinema regularly.He befriends the projectionist,Alfredo,a man of about 35-40 with no family and no obvious friends.Toto learns how to run the projector simply by watching and learning.There’s definitely a loving bond between these two and as Toto’s father is off at war with Russia there’s the father figure aspect too.When a fire breaks out in the cinema and Alfredo is unable to work there Toto takes over.Some time passes and we meet now as an older teen,we see that much of his life is preoccupied with the cinema.He’s in there all the time,even loses his virginity in it.Then he meets a girl and there’s a bit of a sad love story.I’m not going to give you a scene by scene retelling of the film.It’s pretty descent,the parts with the kid Toto are funny.The child actor who portrays him is excellent.There are a few sad bits where Toto loses the girl and can’t find her and decides to say goodbye to his town and never look back.These bits i found a little hard to believe.Like if he loved her then he would have found her,but i guess not everything can have a happy ending.A great film non the less.

IMDB RATING      –     8.3
MY RATING     –    8.2
SEEN BEFORE     –     NO
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  GOOD STORY.THE FIRST 2 PARTS ARE THE BEST.

86 – Oldboy (2003)

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you.Weep and you weep alone.

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you.Weep and you weep alone.

For anyone who hasn’t seen Oldboy I’ll describe it simply.If you ever watched Big Brother it’s quite similar.But while one lasts about 60 days in Oldboy the guy is locked up for 15 years.Also while one is psychological and sadistic the other is a Korean film. Oldboy is about this guy in his 20’s who gets kidnapped one night while drunk.He’s then locked in a room for 15 years with no human contact.He doesn’t know why or who put him there but when he gets released he sets about finding out.There’s some great camera work and the whole look of the film is excellent.Even the animated title credits look great.As he tries to find out who put him there he has to beat up a lot of people.These fight scenes are something else.The single shot corridor fight sequence is one to look out for.In the end he finds out how and why and it’s a bit of a twist.But i will say something,the final scene where he gets hypnotised he’s a bit selfish and could have hypnotised to alter his memory in another way.If you watch it you’ll know what i mean.

IMDB RATING      –     8.3
MY RATING     –    8.6
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  A CORKER.THERE WAS 2 SCENES THAT MAKE ME CRINGE,DENTIST AND TONGUE CUTTING.

89 – Metropolis (1927)

Hello,is that 11811?Yeah can i get the number for Dominos Pizza in Letterkenny?Cheers

Hello,is that 11811?Yeah can i get the number for Dominos Pizza in Letterkenny?Cheers

Fuck i hate Metropolis so bad.I had to watch it in college and my lecturer was rabbiting on about this that and the other,but it’s tribe.This copy I’ve downloaded had some additional text at the beginning stating that the film was constructed from various sources of original negatives and that about a quarter or it had been lost or destroyed.Good.If only three quarters had been destroyed and one remained.If you’re having trouble sleeping then I’d recommend this film.After 7-8 minutes,every time i put this on i fall asleep.Anyone who can sit through this two hour long silent film which doesn’t have an ending needs to get their head examined.The plot can be simple or excessively complex depending on who you ask,but ill give you a run down of it.A hot shot build a big city,the workers live underground,his wife dies birthing his son,a mad scientist make a robot that looks like she was made out of old beer cans and some car parts.The scientist said something that caught my eye “give me 24 hours and no one will be able to tell the difference between a man and a robot man”.Bullshit,what’s he going to do in 24 hours?Put a hat and a trench coat on it?Fuck me it took him over 20 years to build that tin monstrosity ,i don’t think he’ll do much more in 24 hours.But with the use of a few wires and neon lights he manages to put the robot inside of a chick,or put her skin on it.It all doesn’t make sense one bit.Visually there’s some nice large set pieces but that’s all i can say about it.If you fancy having a look at a Metropolis remake I’d go for the 2001 Anime version.The Simon & Garfunkel track near the end in haunting.

IMDB RATING      –     8.2
MY RATING     –    2.5
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     NO
OVERALL     –  DO YOURSELF A FAVOUR~POKE YOUR EYES OUT BEFORE WATCHING.

91 – Bicycle Thieves (1948)

A nice glass of wine for the little kid.

A nice glass of wine for the little kid.

Bicycle Thieves is an Italian film about a man who gets his bike stolen.Set in Rome in the 1940’s there’s not many jobs about and everyone is barely scraping by on the dole but one day the guy gets offered a job putting up posters for movies and the like.But there’s one prerequisite:that he has a bike.He did have a bike but he pawned it to buy food for his wife and kid.His wife then pawns her bedsheets she got as weddings gifts and gets the bike back.So things are looking up for the small family.Then as buddy is up a ladder putting up his first poster the bike gets stolen.He spends the rest of the film worrying and going around to places where they sell bikes and bike parts.Eventually he catches the bugger who stole his bike but it’s in a rough part of town and all his neighbours gang up on him and are sticking up for the thief,he has no other option than to walk away.The last 5 minutes are sad,i won’t spoil it for you.

IMDB RATING      –     8.3
MY RATING     –    8.2
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  WELL SHOT.GOOD STORY AND THE KIDS A GOOD ACTOR.

102 -A Separation (2011)

This one's taken out of context...                    .... or is it?

This one’s taken out of context… …. or is it?

I think this is the first Muslim film on the list,they’re probably too busy beating and opressing their wives to make that many films.As the title suggests this is about a couple who are going through a sepetation.The husband lives with  his dad,who has alzheimers,and his 11 year old daughter.His wife leaves and goes to live with her mother,i think.So the guy needs to get someone in to watch his dad during the day while he’s a work and the kid is at school.Here’s where things get a bit tricky.He manages to get a woman in to watch his dad but she cant handle the work load and quits,but she says he husband might be better.The guy then meets the husband and the husband agrees.Roll on the first day and low and behold buddy doesnt show up but his wife does.Her husband is in jail for owing money to lenders so she’ll cover for him today.Things get a bit heated when the guy lands home,something about stolen money,and he’s shoves her out the door and into the stairwell.Then she has a miscarriage and the fetus falls from under her burka and bounces down a few steps.Okay so maybe the fetus didnt fall out,but she loses the baby.There’s a big court battle after and things are prety heated.Muslims are aggressive loud fuckers.

IMDB RATING      –     8.3
MY RATING     –    6.6
SEEN BEFORE     –     NO
RECOMMEND?     –     NO
OVERALL     – SLOW BURNER AND AN AWFUL LOT OF AGRESSION/FIGHTING.

104 – Grave of the Fireflies (1988)

Pre-pubesent topless scene,sure why not?

Pre-pubesent topless scene,sure why not?

Graveyard for the Fireflys is a Japanese anime film about some war.I wasn’t the best at history in school nor did i care for it so i’m going to say it was a war with America.Correct me if i’m wrong.The story is about a teeanage boy and his kid sister and their struggle to stay alive.Their home is hit in an air-raid and so is the shelter,where his mother was,so they are left with no home and no mother.The father all the while is a naval office fighting the yanks.Thentwo kids grab what they can from their old house and make there way to an aunt.The aunt is  atoatal hardass to them so they say ‘fuck it’ and pack all their things and move into a derelict room/tunnel thing beside a lake.I won’t spoil it for you but everyone dies in the end.Not a bad anime,i think it could work really well as a live action.As sad as this film was i wasnt moved,but a live action version would bring down the house.

IMDB RATING      –     8.3
MY RATING     –    8
SEEN BEFORE     –     NO
RECOMMEND?     –     NO
OVERALL     –  OKAY.QUITE SAD.THE ONLY REASON I WOULDN’T RECOMMEND IT IS BECAUSE
I CAN THINK OF BETTER ONE’S I’D RECOMMEND FIRST.

105 – Pan’s Labyrinth (2006)

Ouch! Me nose !

`Ouch! Me nose !

For some reason i always thought that Pans Labyrinth was a kids movie,albeit a rather dark kids movie.I think maybe because the lead character is a young girl i just automatically think the target audience are children. But I’m way off the mark you only have to wait 11 minutes to see how wrong i was.There’s a scene,picture above,where the captain smashes a farmers face in with a wine bottle and then shoots him and his father twice.Del Toro is a good director with a flair for the surreal and disturbing.He always has some great imagery.He did Hellboy too and as far a comic book movies go i’d rate it fairly high.Pans Labyrinth is about a small girl and her mother,who married a Spanish captain in the war,and their move up into the woods with a ton of soldiers and the like to plan attacks and root out the guerillas.The girl,Ofelia,is a bit infatuated with faeries and reads a lot of books on the subject. Beside the house are all these strange structures like labyrinths and stone monuments with carvings on them that no one seems to give a fuck about except Ofelia.Its here she meets a Faun and he tells her she is the soul of the underworld and needs to return there as she’s a princess.It all gets a big bizarre in parts with some brutal violence thrown in too.Ofelia makes it home in the end to the underworld,or she dies and makes it to her version of heaver.You can make up your own mind here.

IMDB RATING      –     8.3
MY RATING     –    8
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  GOOD,BUT NOT ONE FOR THE KIDS.