15 – Goodfellas (1990)

What do you say to a crazy woman is pointing a loaded gun in your face?Whatever the fuck she wants to hear.

What do you say to a crazy woman pointing a loaded gun in your face?Whatever the fuck she wants to hear.

It says in the beginning,after a really really ugly bunch of title credits,that the film is based on a true story and for anyone who has ever watched Banged Up Abroad there is an episode that is nearly a scene by scene remake of this film.The real guy is narrating it too. Goodfellas is a descent gangster/Mafia film.As per-usual we have the regular actors like  DeNiro,Liotta,Pesci and a few other regular faces you might recognise from The Sopranos.The film is the life story of a kid who gets in with the wise guys in his neighbourhood,starts doing small jobs for them and gradually makes his way to the big time.He gets in deep with drugs after a stint inside and that’s his downfall.Well really it’s some of the women who fuck shit up for him too.Martin Scorsese directed this and had a fine cast to work with.There’s something about Ray Liottas laugh that i find funny,i was trying to find a clip of him on YouTube where he hits a toad with a golf club and there’s a half minute montage of all his laughs from Goodfellas. I noticed Samuel L.Jackson had a part in this film too.One shot,from the moment we see him until he gets killed.A whopping 46 seconds.Is there any role he won’t turn down?

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    8.5
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  GOOD BUT SOME VERY GRAPHIC/BLOODY SCENES.

 

sam l 46 seconds

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16 – Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope (1977)

Here's an ad for MasterCard i spotted.

Here’s an ad for MasterCard i spotted.

I was about 5 minutes in and i had to stop the film to see if i had downloaded the right film.Lucas just throws you into the film,there’s no hanging about,that’s why i thought i had the fifth or sixth in the series.I didn’t. Lucas knows how to write a good story i’ll give him that.It’s got adventure, action, comedy and a few other bits that i thought stood out,maybe for the wrong reasons,like when Luke finds his aunt and uncles and they look like they’re just after climbing out of an oven in Auschwitz. Gruesome. Like all films there’s a few bits and pieces i’ll mention,I’ll start with the good.The special effects:You can see Lucas is trying to go the extra mile and will put in the effort to have set pieces where he can and will have some really nice props,be it costumes/suits/aliens or what ever in lieu of CGI.I noticed a small plot hole,well maybe not a hole,but Ben mentions when they find the scavengers truck in the desert that the holes and blaster damage is definitely from Stormtroopers because it’s so accurate.Accurate my ass,them Stormtroopers couldn’t hit a target 2 metres in from of themselves.In one scene where Han and Cheewie run back there’s 6-7 of them when he turns a corner and not one of the buggers gets a shot close to him.And i’ll finish up with a question.If Darth vader is the last Jedi and is pretty powerful does he know Luke and Leia are his kids?Surely he must,he was there when they were made wasn’t he.

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    8.4
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  GREAT.A FEW SCENES WHERE LUCAS HAS ‘RE-USED’ FOR INDIANA JONES.

P.S. The Wilhelm Scream , well done mr Lucas i think i heard it about 5 times.

17 – Seven Samurai (1954)

I'm not sure why this samurai went to battle with his bare ass out.

I’m not sure why this samurai went to battle with his bare ass out.

Here’s an old one,1954,you wouldn’t think it from the dialogue.There’s some good insults in it that are still used frequently these days.The wipes are pretty good from scene to scene,they look quite animated.In 50’s films they all have a dissolve but in this it’s all Left-to-right fade thing.The earliest ones I’ve ever seen.The plot sees a crap village that regularly gets ambushed by bandits,hard asses,and they decide to hire some Samurai’s to kill the buggers.They rationalize that they need 5 so they get 7,and some are pretty shite.The Samurai train the farmers to fight,build fences and moats and instill a team spirit in them.As the farmers finish harvest they get ready for a big battle.Some the Samurai seem pretty Calais when they’re picking them off and counting numbers.I didn’t like this film,man was it a hard watch,i kept getting sleepy or bored and had to pause it.It’s not for me then.

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    6.7
SEEN BEFORE     –     NO
RECOMMEND?     –     NO
OVERALL     –  WAY TOO LONG.

18 – The Matrix (1999)

After Neo learns Jujitsu he learns some other needed fighting styles,drunken being one of them.

After Neo learns Jujitsu he learns some other needed fighting styles,drunken being one of them.

Here we have a pretty wicked Anime called Ghost in The Shell,wait i meant a live action film called The Matrix.The Matrix is a highly original film apart from all the bits they ripped off scene for scene from the Anime that they had to get legally cleared to use in the film.Besides that it’s okay.I for one am not a fan.It centrals around a guy called Neo who meets a black dude who’s some sort of drug dealer. Well at least it’s realistic. I’m not sure if this films stands the test of time.There were loads of bits that either seemed very camp or just didn’t feel right.I’ll try and not go into a rant here but,plot holes,the whole concept of machines growing humans to generate electricity is a pile of dung.For one surely it would take a shit load of electricity to keep this humans plugged into this big fake world and then there’s the actual fact that humans consume energy and not generate it.

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    7.7
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  MEH,MOSS IS A BIT DEPRESSING LOOKING.THE SOUND LEVELS WERE ALL OVER THE PLACE TOO.

19 – Forrest Gump (1994)

Forrest sees his first tit.Blows the load into Jennys room-mates towel.The room-mate is awake and listening.

Forrest sees his first tit.Blows the load into Jennys room-mates towel.The room-mate is awake and listening.

Haley Joel Fucking Osment,what a little shit.There’s something about his face that makes me want to punch it.The little shit can’t act.Every time i see him i’m reminded that i’m watching a film and it spoils the whole effect.Lets set that aside.Apart from that this film is excellent.The first 15 minutes i thought Hanks was over acting the retarded angle with Forrest but as the film went on i understood that he was doing something that is called ‘acting’,powerful stuff.Forset Gump is about a guy who’s waiting for a bus who starts to tell anyone who’s listening about his life story.Interesting stuff.For the first chapter he tells a black woman how he was named after a leader of the  KKK.Great conversation starter.The films got a cool story with Forest interacting with some major people and times in history.The CGI looks well for a film of its age,better than the last film on the list in my opinion but then again there’s no orcs and dragons flying about.Forests love interest is a bit of a douche.Ditching at every possible opportunity so she can fuck off and see the world.But once he’s a millionaire she lands back.The she’s off again.Then she catches a ‘virus’,it’s fucking AIDS innit, and needs Forest to watch the kid.Is it even his?The whole film has a great soundtrack,full of nostalgic hits from the different eras he’s knocking about in.

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    8.6
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  SAD MOMENTS TIMED EVERY 30 MINUTES AFTER 15 MINUTES IN.

20 – City of God (2002)

12mm ? More like the 12 incher.

12mm ? More like the 12 incher.

I’ve seen City of God only once before.Nine and a half years ago i rented it from Lazer on George Street in Dublin.They had an extensive art house and international films section and we were working our way through them.Excellent film.There’s not much to fault here in this film.It’s got a great story,setting and delivery.It introduces you to interesting characters in one scene and then you have to hold out to find out what’s the beef with them.Camera work and the overall aesthetic of the film is spot on for a film set in the 60’s-70’s.The chicken sequence at the very beginning is bloody hilarious i think.The films set in the favelas of Rio De Janera,City of God,and boy is it a rough place.Kids running around with guns shooting the fuck out of people for no reason other that the fact that they have a gun so why not.The film’s told through quite a few intertwining flashbacks with a narrative over some bits.Good soundtrack too,some great Brazilian music and then more recognisable stuff for the disco scenes in the 70’s.Based on a true story too,you can see the photos and footage of some of the real characters over the credits. I’m just after having a look over the IMDB and it was nominated for 4 Oscars,didn’t win any of them but got a load form other festivals.

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    8.8
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  SPECTACULAR.BUT THERE’S A RAPE SCENE AT 82 MINUTES,BOO.

21 – The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

The Olympic Torch makes its way into isengard.

The Olympic Torch makes its way into isengard.

Lord of The Rings is about a wealthy English nobleman who has a penchant for collecting wedding rings.Not,everyone knows what LOTR is about.I was looking forward to this on the list but when the film starts it just jumps right in.The story begins right after the credits,no humming or ha-ing.It’s the second film so i guess there was reason to go back and retell or introduce anything.That’s why the first third of the film i wasn’t too bothered about the characters,then the second third i was just getting to know them again and there side stories and the last bit i was excited and now that it’s over i want to watch the next one.But i don’t think i’ll bother,i seen it some 10 years,yes it’s been 10 years,ago and it’s a long film too.I found a lot of the CGI didn’t hold the test of time.I guess when you’re making an epic film,or three,you have to skimp and cut corners somewhere and there was more scenes than i care to mention that the special effects just looked a bit on the shit side for me.Great story though and fair dues to Jackson for tackling and fighting to get the rights to make the film.Lets see,notable stuff:Aragon or the buck who plays him is a solid actor,merry and pippen come across as too camp in places,Sauromon must spend half his day combing his hair up in that castle like Rapunzele or something.Also the Orcs had a pretty good grasp of language,who taught them how to speak?I noticed 2 chatting to each other while guarding the black gate,what would they be talking about? “Going out for the weekend?” , “How’s the missus?”

IMDB RATING      –     8.7
MY RATING     –    7.8
SEEN BEFORE     –     YES
RECOMMEND?     –     YES
OVERALL     –  EITHER WATCH THEM ALL TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL.